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First let me say Proverbs 31 is a lovely passage,  often forgotten  but it is actually , “The words of king Lemuel, the prophecy that his mother taught him.” It is  beautiful tribute to wives, to mothers, to women, perhaps even to the church herself, the bride, “Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.” Nothing wrong with scripture, and of course nothing wrong with pouring goodness over husbands either.

However, there are many teachings about the Proverbs 31 wife that concern me, and all in good humor a couple of Proverbs 31 wife bloggers who are so oozing goodness and virtue, they are practically hissing and spitting their goodness all over me and a few others too. It’s actually rather comical to watch women hissing so much “virtue” at their sisters.

It concerns me however, because it’s a recipe for disaster, ulcers and high blood pressure, eating disorders and stress. Women, girls have been pursing the good and perfect with tragic results since forever because “the good” will never been good enough. You can never be thin enough, pretty enough, smart enough, good enough, rich enough, virtuous enough…

So enough with the attempts to be “good enough.” I much prefer to be a fallen woman because it is rooted in truth and ends in salvation.

I don’t know if anyone noticed, but Jesus Christ does not come knocking on the door of the Proverbs 31 wife declaring, I come for the virtuous. Not at all, he came for the sinners, the fallen women. He reveals Himself to the woman at the well, the woman with five husbands. He rescues the adulteress from stoning and 7 demons come out of Mary Magdalene. There is not a virtuous Proverbs 31 wife anywhere to be found. They are all fallen women and that is no accident, scripture makes no mistakes.

That is because we are all fallen women. F-a-l-l-e-n, like Wiley Coyote taking a nose dive of a cliff and face planting at the bottom. Deeply flawed, imperfect, definitely not virtuous. No one pure, holy, virtuous, not one. In fact, it can be very harmful attempting to justify ones own self by virtue of one’s own virtue. It also can’t be done becasue one can never be “good enough” to repay what was done for us on the cross.

The perfect really is the enemy of the good. There is so much stress, tension, self harm, just oozing from women striving to declare their goodness, their virtue, to prove their worth and value in the world, and it is somewhat heartbreaking watch.

Those fallen women had value to Jesus Christ, they followed Him, He even thought they were worth dying for. He saw their potential, He saw the virtue lurking within their souls, not always evident on the outside, not always seen by the culture’s eyes, not perceived valuable in the context of human hierarchies, but chosen, loved, and redeemed by Him.

I always think of the woman with the perfume, of the powerful truth to be found there, Wherefore I say unto thee, Her sins, which are many, are forgiven; for she loved much: but to whom little is forgiven, the same loveth little.

Wrapped in nothing but our own virtue, we will love little. The fruit of the Spirit are just that, fruit of the Spirit, not fruit of ourselves.