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Doug Wilson wrote a post, Submission as the S Word mentioning among other things, a post on wifely submission that no doubt went over like a ton of bricks on facebook.

No complaints about Doug Wilson’s post at all, nor about the woman’s post either. It actually grieves me that some of us are madly in love with the Lord, and with husbands, and have found freedom in scripture, peace in our souls from submission, and that attempts to share some of this wisdom, some of the truth and beauty to be found there, are so often met with outright hostility, contempt, and complete disrespect.

I however, do not blame the culture, I pin that resistance squarely on those perceived to be Christians, on the Dalrockians and Biblical Gender Roles players in the world. I left this comment over at Wilson’s blog and I meant it, every word,

“I have to say that blogging about submission and marriage is a brutal business and as much as I’d like to pin that on the culture, the non believers, the feminists, that road to hell has actually flat out been paved by Christians themselves. First there is the manosphere, the alt right, shrieking “women submit, women submit,” until one starts to believe Ephesians 5:22 is now the entire bulk of scripture. Then there is the BDSM community, and the red pills and pick up artists and assorted sexual perversonists, and then there are also the Proverbs 31 wives all to ready to hiss and spit their virtuous selves all over you.”

“Submission is a beautiful thing, as is marriage, and the design is rather perfect, however I have to say I can link to half a dozen Christian bloggers right now, Christian mind you, who are actually promoting abuse and the devaluing of women, who are enough to convince any woman with a lick of sense to flee from the very idea. That is where the heart of the battle exists and I do hold them all accountable for what they do, because they are the enemy, they take truth and beauty and make it ugly, and they do it in Christ’s name.”

“Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.” 1 Corinthians 13:1

The problem with a sounding brass and tinkling cymbal is that they are loud, very loud, and they drown out any voice trying to speak softly, and they stand there as an example of what authority abused really looks like, of what scripture taught without love actually produces.

Women, not being particularly stupid, can usually see through this hypocrisy and rightfully conclude, submission?! Forget the whole concept, that man needs somebody to bake him a batch of brownies, heavily laced with fiber because he is obviously full of coconut candy. That is the real “S word,” lurking behind the problem of trying to teach submission. He who is not under authority, has no authority. And He who speaks without love, teaches falsely.

The enemy is within our confines, not outside the gates, and it stems from false teachings, from mis-appropriated scripture, from abused authority, and from our own unwillingness to speak out against those things, to drag that garbage out into the sunlight, or out into the Son Light if you will.

Women cannot lead from the bottom, not when there are men and women, Christian men and women,  stomping on every petal being laid down upon the path.