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A man tried to hold the door open for me today. Obviously he’s sexist and thinks 
I don’t know how to open doors.

I am entitled to free birth control in my health care policy. So what if Granny has to pay for her own heart
medication? Not.My.Problem. #WarOnWomen!

People do not appreciate my work. I sent out half a dozen tweets to #SaveOurGirls and nobody has validated my
commitment to women and girl’s education. I care more than anybody else. I clicked “like” didn’t I?

I’m a US Congresscritter with a hand knitted, stuffed uterus on my desk and people do not show me the respect
I deserve. Yesterday I wore my ovary hat and people just averted their eyes.

I hate the word bossy! It’s sexist! Ban it!

I posted nine selfies on facebook yesterday. Why won’t people just leave me alone?
I feel like everybody is staring at me.

I read a politically incorrect blog today that made me uncomfortable. Trigger! I feel so violated.
I should not be burdened with clicking it away, they should be removed from the intertoobz.

I’m entitled to equal pay for equal work, even though I take 6 months off to find myself, have babies,
get married, and work in traditonally female dominated professions anyway.

I am 50 thousand in debt for my education in art sustainability and nobody will hire me as a CEO.
My student debt should be forgiven.

I am the most tolerant person ever. When a Muslim guy kills his wife, I am entitled to point fingers at…
rabid right wing Christians. I am so not an Islamaphobe. Besides, everyone knows Christians are sexist.

I walked by a bunch of men today wearing my lime green fishnets and a safety pin through my eyebrow and they
stared at me! Men should never, ever look at me without my consent, even on a public street. I am so oppressed.

Everybody in America should be mandated to have nine cats so nobody can call me a crazy cat lady.
We need more cat rescues…and a cat tax because I feel bad for the kitties.

I hate men! They’re pathetic….oh gawd, I’m so tired of being single.

Fat acceptance is a feminist issue! Men should not be allowed to desire thin women, ever. It makes fat women
feel bad… No, I’d never date a short guy, do you think I want to look like an idiot when I’m wearing heels?

red queen

Ah, the trials and tribulations of first world feminism, walking face first into walls one comment at a time.
No, I didn’t make any of these up and yes, I suspect the world ends soon. Either that or we all stampede
ourselves off a cliff like a bunch of wildebeests at a pro-choice demonstration.

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the fairest of them all?