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Unmitigated it means, “not diminished or moderated in intensity or severity; unrelieved,” as in the unmitigated disaster just marches on.

It might seem odd, this being a biology blog and all, that I avoid writing very much about the unfolding public health disaster, specifically the vaccine. If you are interested in such things, I highly recommend alicespringstomind. There you will find dozens of calm and well reasoned posts and numerous sensible links for you to research to your heart’s content. I give it four stars, a consistently admirable effort.

I remain unvaxxed.

I continue to read the research, the latest information, but for the most part I am just heartbroken, without words, and unable to formulate my thoughts properly. It’s awful, tortuous perhaps, to know what is happening and to be completely powerless to do anything to prevent it. I can’t even get the people I care about to listen to me or even discuss it. Most of them are now heavily vaxxed and boosted, and coming down with covid.

If repeated bouts of covid is the only harm they come to, I will be exceedingly grateful.

When we recently went and set up the vaccine centers for babies and small children here where I live, I spent 3 days in bed, simply unable to face the world anymore. So no, I am not starting to “respect the science” or softening my position, in fact the precise opposite. I’m just trying to stay sane and focus on things that aren’t so painful to watch.

It can also get very isolating, very lonely. There is this huge, pink elephant standing between me and most other people, this hidden truth that can’t be spoken of. Everything is fine, just fine, but of course it isn’t fine at all. I’ve never done well with that sort of thing, the tension of pretending always starts to makes my face hurt.

I try to remind myself that the human body is wonderfully and fearfully made. Just because I can see the potential worst case scenario, doesn’t mean there aren’t more positive variables I’ve missed. As Monty Python so delightfully sang, “always look on the bright side of life.”