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I was reading another post called, “Christians Don’t Want The Truth, They Want The Happy,” a post that pretty much sums up some issues you see within the church at large, the church overall. There is a real backlash right now against the so called prosperity gospel and the joy brigades.
I’m a bit of collateral damage from this culture war. This may sound a bit harsh but I’m at a point in my life where I now realize the error is actually in those two little words, “Christians want.” The entire root of this problem is seeking people favor, being concerned about what other “Christians want.”
Trust me, almost nobody cares about discovering what the Holy Spirit might want….
You know why many people tend to put on a plastic face in church and joyfully fake how blessed they are?? Because we just eat our own. Because the last place you would ever want to be vulnerable is in a church. That might sound harsh, but guess what, I’m not happy. I’m not happy about the fact that I could go pour out my woes in a bar and be accepted and loved, but the church is not a safe place for being real about our lives.
Bars are not a safe place either, but people in the process of trying to drown their sorrows and swallow their demons are far less likely to self righteously gossip about someone else’s hypocrisy. There’s not a lot of hypocrisy in bars. Self deception yes, but not very many acting like holiness is some kind of competition based on a plea bargain system where you get extra credit points for pointing out the sins of others.
And by “bars,” I also mean on the streets where heroin and meth flow, where “those kind of people” gather, you know, the ones that have to deal with things our church is totally unconcerned about because we just kind of levitate three feet off the ground, untouched by the world’s pain.
I’m not happy at the moment, I’m kind of angry, angry and sad, for decades now. I’ve watched our indifference, our stonewalling, our complete avoidance for so long, I actually have trouble even imagining anything else. And I am the church, we are the church. So many people think I point fingers at “the church” as if it were a disembodied entity, unrelated to us. But “we” are the church….
Somebody on Twitter the other day quipped, “it’s easier to believe in Jesus then it is to believe in the church.” Yep, that’s my issue too! It takes a supernatural work of the Holy Spirit for me to even consider the possibility that church is not just a social club like the Elks club, not a place to go buy fire insurance, not a place people visit to just take a political selfie.
Obviously I’m an expert at winning friends and influencing people, but the truth is I’ve loved many broken people, heroin addicts and the hurting, pedophiles and the homeless, people of all races, but trying to love so called good Christians, “good churchians,” well, that’s often been a real struggle, one that requires faith I just don’t have under my own steam.
We’ve just come back from a few days vacation and the highlight of the whole trip for me was when this guy broke his ankle because I got to hold his head and tell him he was brave and wonderful, greatly loved, and stronger then he even realized. Sadly, we people never learn those things about ourselves and about our Lord, until we’re flat on our back and in intense pain.
And we never have the opportunity to speak those words over one another when we lack the courage and fortitude to share our pain and suffering with one an other.
Photo by Emiliano Arano on Pexels.com
See, there's this thing called biology... 
Wow…
“From Him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in Love, as each part does its work.” Eph 4:16
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I read those words and I realize there’s only two possibilities, either the Bible is wrong or we are doing such a poor job of being the church, that we are unrecognizable as the church. But the bible also says, “Let God be true, and every human being a liar.” So I’m going with, we’re doing a poor job.
Keep in mind I live in the second most secular county in the nation, absolutely ravished by meth and heroin epidemic, with rampant poverty, high unemployment, this huge gap between the rich and the poor. There are some bright spots here, but for the most part this really is an area of complete indifference towards one another.
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I agree, especially considering the idea that we focus on what Christians want versus what the Holy Spirit wants. I found your post to support the verse, since it commands to us to come together and act as a body. The state of our world is testament enough of the fact that our body is performing in scattered and discombobulated ways, for a truly supported, connected body is effective in following Christ’s head. Christ is loving and winning souls, especially of those who are broken and blind. His body IS recognizable, therefore the fault is ours.
Two verses above, Eph 4:14-15 “Then we will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and cunning and craftiness of men in their deceitful scheming. Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ.”
The church diaspora (figuratively speaking) seems to be a problem of immaturity…as we know, immaturity is associated with selfishness and that whole problem of “wanting.” In that same vein, we as immature and self-centered cannot see ourselves as part of the church who is wrong because we are deceived into thinking that blasting the prosperity gospel or what-have-you is enough.
We must embrace the faults, hurts, and troubles of our own body (whether it be us or another member) just as when we are physically wounded, the rest of the body comes to heal it. It’s hard for a broken person to heal a broken person.
In that light, just want to send you some love where you find it hard to feel and a piece of hope that the body is trying despite our shortcomings. We ALL have much much work to do.
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“There’s not a lot of hypocrisy in bars. Self deception yes, but not very many acting like holiness is some kind of competition based on a plea bargain system where you get extra credit points for pointing out the sins of others.” (Sorry, what follows is a long comment, but as usual, you’ve opened my mind to a lot of thoughts…)
I agree—there is self-deception in bars & self-righteousness in churches, but there are some Christians who are not hypocrites per se, but simply self-deceived. I was copying my way through James a few months ago and I noticed (for the first time) in chapter one it talks about self-deception three times:
“Do not be deceived, my beloved brothers.” (vv. 13-16)
“But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves” (v22)
“If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person’s religion is worthless.” (v.26)
The Holy Spirit wants us to wake up and see clearly 1) who we truly are, 2) how only Jesus makes us righteous and 3) to reach out to love the broken and hurting. I will admit, I am not the best at #3. People make me anxious even under the best circumstances! I recognized recently that I have allowing my fear (ahem, using it as an excuse!) to do less for other people. It’s gotta change!! It starts with simply reaching out to people, even when we’re nervous about being pushed away.
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You’re awesome, Elihu. I love that “reaching out to other people, even when you’re nervous about being pushed away.” Amen, that’s one side of it! Some of us, like me, tend to not want to reach out at all. So I have to constantly remind myself to just push anyway. And yet, there are also some genuine walls that really need to come tumbling down, some leadership that needs to happen.
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Yes—leadership is vital!
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Interesting point on self-righteousness! I too have to improve in reaching out toward the broken and hurting, it makes me so nervous. Fear gets in the way of finding the courage to push into the hearts of others, not even to be forceful, but to shine Jesus’ light in there.
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Amen. 😊
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I agree, IB. In general, we are doing very poorly as the church in the West. This is why I’ve said we need a fresh reformation at a systemic level about how we perceive what Christianity actually is and what the Church is. But I also don’t want to throw the proverbial baby out with the bathwater, which I don’t think you’re doing here.
We do tend to get cynical, looking at the problem (which takes no spiritual discernment at all), and are tempted to dismiss the local church because of its problems. The truth is, Jesus is never giving up on His church, but He will prune it (ouch!), which I think is what’s going on now. We cannot rightly be the body of Christ on our own and He’s not changing His mind about how He will express Himself on the earth just because we’ve had a bad experience. So, like with a bad marriage, if we want to authentically and honestly follow Christ, we stuck with it and have to stay in the room and work it out with each other.
So we might as well submit to the pruning and get it over as quickly as possible. Upgrade is on the other side. 🙂
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LOL! “Upgrade is on the other side,” I like that.
My hubby, bless his heart, is really good at the stick to it-tiveness. We live about 3 miles from the hospital he was born in. Not everybody should be an extremist like that, but he has taught me that there is real value in sticking with the things and the people who drive you crazy. We live in such a consumer culture, a divorce society, where you just walk away and start over whenever things get uncomfortable. Or worse, you refuse to ever change because it might be disconcerting.
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I’m with your hubby. 👍
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Another AA for IB, among many. I think there should be a large cabinet by the entrance to every Christian gathering place, where the “Church” meets, were we all can drop off our masks as we enter. What a change there would be.
In our pre-service prayer times, we have discussed that a bit before praying. The follow up is, letting the congregation know there will be Altar workers at the front of the sanctuary following the service, if anyone would like prayer. Only the individual spoken to, who will pray, will know the request, and it shall remain confidential. That is making quite a difference, as each Sunday there are some who will go for prayer.
Personally I got so tired with always giving the automatic “fine thanks”, when asked how I am, that I have told people how I am suffering. Although showing surprise, some have asked if they could pray right then, and have continued praying. I know that, because each week they ask if there is progression, let me know they are still praying, and at times will pray again right then.
These are great experiences, seeing Holy Spirit in our lives individually, and throughout the congregation.
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I’m sorry your church experience is so churchian, IB. If it’s any encouragement, not all churches or preachers who lead their flock into the Christian walk, are so indifferent to the needs of the lost, the needy, the desperate, the hopeless. Don’t lose heart!
Becky
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Well said my angry and frustrated friend— I dare say many of us feel the exact same!!!
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Hmm … I prefer the bars to church. 🙂
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LOL! Right? I once tried to explain this to my elders. I see a lot of hurting and broken people in bars, people who don’t realize that, “she who has the Most High, needs no other high.” But what they often do have in bars is a commonality of purpose and unity in their suffering. Sad to say it, but many bar tenders are genuinely much happier to see you than people in churches are.
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Things we can learn from bartenders:
– Remember the customer’s name
– Remember their drink
– Listen to the customer
– At least pretend to care about their problems
– Check in with them on a regular basis
– Be grateful when they pay the tab
– Call a cab if they need a ride home
– Pretend they aren’t there if someone calls them.
Blessings!
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LOL! That’s fabulous. 🙂
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Wow! I’ve never been to a bar; I’ve been to lots of churches. I’ve loved churches and people at the churches. However, you all make me want to go to some bars to see what I’ve been missing!
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🙂
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I quite agree–especially with the line about “Christians want…” Once when a board sent out a survey about what the members of the congregation wanted, especially regarding worship practices, I wrote on mine, “Did Jesus get a chance to answer these questions?”
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The Bible says there will be apostasy in the last days, a great falling away.
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Sigh. Yes, but apostasy is always for all those “other people,” the bad ones who fail to unconditionally comply with our fear based churchian systems of power and control. Also, it’s a great excuse for us to not have to share the Good News or show any love toward the lost.
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I think apostasy is just the general human condition in a nut shell anyway.
We all tend to trend downward. Like Paul said, “What I would do, I do not.”
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Good post! Still, I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised that that post you linked to has so few likes. He isn’t scratching itching ears.
Abraham Lincoln had this quote to the effect that what matters is whether we are on God’s side, not whether God’s is on our side. We don’t stop to think we are not the Truth. God is the Truth.
God has offered to save us, but to be saved we must put our faith in Him, not ourselves. If we cannot define happiness as the realization that God loves us, that we can trust Him, we won’t turn to Him and strive to be on His side, to know and obey His Truth.
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I really like your definition of happiness, Tom! “The realization that God loves us and that we can trust in Him.” 🙂
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A vacation that really counted because God sent a Divine Appointment your way. God bless.
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I have been blessed with two churches, one in Seattle and one in Wenatchee, Washington, in which vulnerability and pain were freely confessed and the people loved and accepted, but they were exceptional. In both cases, the pastor and elders were the first to confess their own inadequacy and Phariseeism. Beware churches where the pastor thinks he’s a superstar.
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