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We had another lovely date, ate some Chinese food, watched the sunset, saw some classic cars, and went to the Drive In Movie. It was wonderful, but I think I probably wore hubby out. He’s still recovering from some major health challenges.

It all had a very retro feel, and was great fun. So one of the movies we saw was “MIB, International.” That is from the Men in Black franchise, with the dark suited government agents out hunting aliens. My expectations for this movie were low, but they actually managed to exceed my expectations and bring them even lower.

It’s a bit funny, we had a blast, so it’s  hard to tell you just how terrible this movie really was. I mean, most of the time hubby and I blissfully avoided it by eating peanut M&M’s, and there was even moonlight coming through the car skylight….It was the most amazing movie ever!

No, J/K. It was bad, really bad, and I watch some pretty low budget, independent films all the time.  The kindest thing I can say about this movie would be, it wasn’t evil. No gratuitous pornography or endless human bloodshed. Some aliens were obviously harmed in the making of this movie, but that’s not the kind of spiritual slime I was thinking of….

For any literary types out there, there really are some powerful lessons to be found in “MIB International,” about how not to write romance. How not to write adventure. How not to write intrigue….I could go on and on, but I’ll shut up now.

One problem with the romance, they took a “strong, independent woman” and paired her up with the James Bond-ish, MIB, “bad boy on probation.” Then the two had absolutely no conflict. No tension. He just continues to screw up at life and she just continues to do her job. She pretty much falls for him like one might order a pepperoni pizza. And he just absent mindedly eats the cold pizza! Might as well, there’s nothing else in the fridge…..

It’s kind of a shame because the movie had potential. If only the alien she meets as a child didn’t actually look like a stuffed animal. I mean, the woman has a close encounter with a stuffed animal and now she wants to, “know things about the universe?”

Liam Neeson is a bright spot or at least, he could have been. He gets possessed by an alien and dies. That may have been a  good story line, but honestly it took me longer to write, “Liam gets possessed by an alien and dies,” then it took them to write the whole scene.

I’m really not a girl power, equality now,  enthusiast either, but they botched even that. A young, black woman, comes to an agency called “MEN in Black” and nods politely when she is told, “we just call it that for sentimental reasons.” Then she’s like, “oh, okay.”

Something I really learned in this movie was the value of conflict, tension, the importance of meeting some resistance, some challenge. Without those things you are just pretty much free falling through the universe, trapped on an orbiting rock, eating  congealed pizza from an oil stained cardboard box.

Not that there’s anything wrong with that! I just don’t really want to spend 90 minutes watching you do it.

two alien inside car wallpaper

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