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For those blessed not to know, the intertoobz is all a buzz over Lori Alexander’s article about how men prefer debt free women without tattoos.

Who is Lori and why should anyone care? She’s just this woman who wrote a book and has now positioned herself as a self-proclaimed voice for Christianity and marriage.  Then she proceeds to write some very harsh, judgemental, and condemning things about women. Lots and lots of made up rules about how to be a Christian. She does inspire some good satire and comedy, however. “Heologians” simply takes her words and reverses the genders, which sure does tend to highlight the foolishness.

Why should anyone care? Mostly because Lori is what people are seeing of our Lord and Savior. With her click-baity articles, she is influencing the Christian narrative in a very negative way. How does God feel about women? Well, apparently he is deeply ashamed of us, wants us to be filled with self loathing, and has made our salvation totally dependent on our sexuality and how well we manage to appeal to men. Take for example, “men prefer virgins without tattoos.” Woman, how shall thou be saved? By conforming to one woman’s perceptions of what the perfect Christian wife should look like. By attempting to be pleasing to a select group of men.

And if you actually have tattoos and debt? Well, then clearly you’re out of the club. God doesn’t love you anymore because you’ve blown it. Also, all men think you’re ugly. Especially Lori. Lori wants to be the pretty princess and there can only be one. You may laugh if you want, but that’s a real thing in the world. The women who wrestle with pretty princess syndrome.  And there can only be one!  It simply female sexual competitiveness disguised as biblical values fueled by a  scarcity mindset.

Nobody should be listening to Lori. In truth she’s just a troubled woman who has had a long struggle with some major health issues. Given the nature of click bait however, the cultural drama around anything that makes Christianity look bad, she’s very popular. People who don’t really understand our faith, think she is faith. They think God is all about these made up rules, made up rules that aren’t even in the bible.

I’ve tried to talk to several of these people on their blogs and been promptly banned. Oh ye pink haired Jezebel all wearing yoga pants and sporting tattoos, get your heresy away from me. I jest here, but it’s pretty darn ugly. People actually be revoking my salvation and shrieking God hates you. I’ve been with the Lord for a long time, I can roll my eyes at such things but others who are more vulnerable are having their perceptions of Christianity molded and formed by people like Lori and it’s probably making them throw up in their mouth a little bit.

That urge to recoil in horror, that feeling of slight nausea, that’s discernment, that’s part of our God-given design. There’s a little red flag that goes up and says, uh oh, this isn’t right. Our offense when we see ugly things marketed as “Christian things” is God breathed, God inspired. If there wasn’t a moral standard in the first place, Someone who tells us what is and is not ugly, unfair, and confusing, we’d take no moral offense in the first place.

In a Christian context the existence of people like Lori, should call the rest of us to really get fired up about spreading our faith, about sharing the good news, about breaking down those walls that falsely inform  people  they are somehow kicked out or disqualified from the Lord’s love. And rather than retweeting Lori’s articles far and wide and declaring “this is what’s wrong with faith, this is why I’ll never be a Christian,” we need to become one ourselves and show the world how it’s really done.

We are all without excuse. Some aging woman with major health issues who hates pink hair and yoga pains, so I hate the Lord right back, is a pretty irrational and silly stance to take. There are some really wounded and broken people in the world sporting the Lord’s uniform. They do a lousy job of sharing the good news. Your job is to reach for the Lord yourself and to show the world how it’s really done in way that drowns out the darkness.

 

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