Tags
humor, identity politics, insanitybytes22, life, marriage, opinion, satire, sexism
Men are scary. They just are.
You may wonder what inspired this post. It was actually a discussion about male privilege and how oppressed women are in the modern Western world. Some people on the internet have no idea how much self control I often practice, because I decided to bless those people with nothing more than a one-sided conversation in my own head…..
It is very annoying when I am busy trying to self-identify as privileged, and 50 people on the internet are insisting all women are oppressed, downtrodden, victims of male privilege and patriarchy. Back to the salt mines you go, woman…….
Hey, respect my pronouns, people!
The thing is, if we are allowed to self identify as one of 64 newly created gender categories, it seems only fair that I be allowed to just self identify as privileged, female privileged. And none of this female cis-gendered stuff either, I wish to be a Born-Woman- Female-Privileged. A BWFP. I demand my own category. Get on that already!
Which does beg the question, if whatever you are is somehow “oppressed,” just go ahead and self identify as “privileged” now and call it good. There, FIFY. You’re welcome.
I-dentity politics, I loves them. They are so……irrational and incoherent, like being stuck in a perpetual loop to nowhere.
Back to the scary men, however. IB is so not scary. I could have a complete melt down in the produce section at the grocery store and I might draw a few curious stares. If I am lucky, I might startle some fragile person already prone to anxiety. Indeed, it would take some serious work on my part, some major destruction, just to get anyone’s attention at all. Oh look, IB’s abusing the lemons again. Eye roll.
My husband is a real teddy bear, well, to all of us anyway. Very sweet guy. If he were to have the exact same melt down in the produce section of the grocery store, we’re talking swat team. Black helicopters. Tranquilizer darts. The National Guard. It would be more like a Godzilla movie or preparing for King Kong. He’s scary. He’s scary without even trying. I bet he wouldn’t even have to throw a single watermelon.
That’s so not fair! Sexism for sure, but really the sexism of female privilege at play. Being scary is not always such a good thing. You scare people. Scared people are prone to react defensively. I have a certain kind of freedom he just does not have. The odds are in my favor. It is far less likely I will ever have to deal with anyone’s fear based response to me. Not impossible, but far, far less likely. Men tend to get shot a whole lot more often, because they are scary.
I remember over the years, the kids chiding their dad, Dad, chill! Dad stop, you’re going to scare people. Dad, you’re going to embarrass us. The poor man once yelled “crap” at a four way stop and cleared the whole intersection. I also remember the hurt in his eyes, the confusion that clouded over them each and every time we said something.
The look that said, but I’d never hurt any of you.
Ouch. That’s a burden I’ve never had to bear, a hurt I’ve never had to endure.
I’m sorry.
superwifeandmummy said:
This is fab, IB. You’re spot on
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silenceofmind said:
I had a melt down in the grocery parking lot a couple of days ago.
It seems I left my precious iPad at the checkout. My entire life plus the two games I play are on that iPad.
I did disturb a couple of birds and a lady who sitting nearby in her car probably trying to catch a moment’s peace while the kiddies were doing the shopping.
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hokusgrey said:
I loved this. Glad you wrote it.
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Wally Fry said:
You have said a true thing here IB. I am told sometimes to not look so mad. I’m not mad, it’s just my face. Plus, I tend to talk loudly, in my “man voice.” I also know I am not alone in this. Good stuff
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oneta hayes said:
A compassionate walk in some fella’s shoes.
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Debbie L said:
It’s interesting how our grandsons seem to respond so much better to thief papa than me! It’s the man-voice as mentioned!
And now that you’ve mentioned it, I often wonder what inspires many of your posts when you don’t mention it! 😉
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Debbie L said:
Their not thief!!!
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gmgoetz said:
You got us all wondering with that one. 😀
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Debbie L said:
LOL
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Lynda Lee/@LadyQuixote said:
My husband is 6’2″ and weighs close to 300 lbs. We live in New Mexico, where the population as a whole is considerably shorter. My dear hubby has deliberately cultivated a very soft speaking voice, in an attempt not to intimidate people. His closest friend, a man barely over 5′ tall, calls my husband “Gentle Ben.” But I have seen the fear on people’s faces when my husband is irritated. I have seen a police officer put his hand on his gun…
At a little over 5’7″ (I’ve shrunk since I was 5’9″), I am not nearly as intimidating as my husband. However, I have been known to put the fear of God in grown men with just an angry LOOK. This was before my PTSD was diagnosed and treated, and I carried a LOT of unresolved anger.
A few days ago, I stood beside my willowy, 25 year old, 6′ tall Harvard student granddaughter as we watched her equally tall and slender 26 year old fiancee make his way, alone, through airport security prior to boarding a flight back to Boston. A recent Harvard University graduate himself, he is both brilliant and very gentle. He is also, as my granddaughter says, “ambiguous brown”, having been born in Pakistan.
My granddaughter’s facial expression and body language was big time scary as she waited for someone in TSA to profile her true love as a potential terrorist.
Scary women run in our family. 😀
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M Simon said:
My daughter is 6′ (she also models) and has a degree in Chem E. She is a wiz at thermo. I’ve grilled her. She is not scary.
Me? 186.69 cm About 220 lbs. My wife married me BECAUSE I’m scary. She wanted a protector. Even when she has bad things to say about me she always says, “…but you are a good protector.” We have been together 43 years so far.
When I flew a lot I always got wanded. Every single time. So much for “random checks”. Since 9/11 I don’t fly. Too much security for my taste. And I used to design components for aircraft (generator controls).
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Chaplapreneur said:
I love it even though I am not allowed to admit it!
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Vernon said:
That’s how it is for us men.
And for a black man if I just raise my voice the police is coming.
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thewayonline said:
Before Jesus came women were oppressed. Women of the western new world are not oppressed. https://bible.org/article/christianity-best-thing-ever-happened-women
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Alex Stepford said:
I was raised by a single father. Men can be scary though most of them only become scary to protect the ones they love or to teach them tough lessons. It will be something you will be grateful for in the end.
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SLIMJIM said:
LOL that picture
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Simmone Nadeem said:
Hey can you check out my poem on my blog 😊
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TheRohaan said:
https://rohaansyed.wordpress.com please check out my blog.
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R. Michae said:
Haha! I love it! Excellent way to reveal the absurdity of professional victimhood.
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