I have decided to simply self-identify as a Messianic Jew. This should help to provide emotional validation and comfort to those who continuously accuse me of being “pickled in post-modernism.” Quite so, post modern it is, you may now pat yourself on the back for your vastly superior powers of discernment. I will issue a list of acceptable pronouns post-haste, so you will all know how to validate and affirm my new identity……
For those concerned about my excessive use of the word “I,” we shall now refer to ourself as a “we.” This should help to confirm either that there is a mouse in my pocket or that “we” suffer from a pathological personality disorder. Or perhaps both. Nikola Tesla was said to a have had a love affair with a pigeon, so a mouse in We’s pocket should not be such a big deal.
Self-identifying as a Messianic Jew should help to drive away the anti-Semites, too. We is so bored hearing endless tales of the vast Jewish conspiracy for world domination. We is rather hurt to find We accused of anti-Semitism herself. We is actually quite fond of Jews, and of Israel too, so if there is a secret Jewish cabal actually interested in world domination, we so hope they send We an email and avail themselves of my services.
We is quite pleased to discover that We can now self-identify as a Messianic Jew and maintain her half century of faith in a consistent manner. Same bible, same Jewish Messiah, same nothing but the blood of Jesus except We shall now use proper Hebrew names for my Lord and Savior and declare, nothing but the blood of Yeshua.ย
I hope my critics find this pleasing. We do aim to please. Also, attempting to learn Hebrew is going to really byte, but We shall do our best.
Joseph E Bird said:
Actually, you are sanity amidst the madness.
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insanitybytes22 said:
Why,thank you. ๐
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K. Q. Duane said:
Glad to hear YOUS have come to an understanding. ๐
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insanitybytes22 said:
LOL! We’s haz. Oh dear, pronouns are hard. ๐
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K. Q. Duane said:
๐ That’s why the feminist academics who try to eliminate all written references to anything male, always look ridiculous. ๐
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Rick Wilcox said:
and happy Saturday to you too ๐
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insanitybytes22 said:
And to you. ๐
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Tiribulus said:
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Mel Wild said:
Is that the Wailing Wall. then…?
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craftysurf said:
Glad you realize labels are for the benefit of others….๐๐๐
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Wally Fry said:
If we find your mind during our rounds today, we shall return it to ya’ll
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insanitybytes22 said:
Lovely,Wally! It’s too little to run around unattended ๐
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patrickhawthorne01 said:
Girl….Youse a mess.
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insanitybytes22 said:
Amen! But if we’re going to be mess, at least be a hot mess. ๐
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jackfussellacrosstheland said:
Ah, great post.
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silenceofmind said:
If only my 1st, 4th and 5th wife had been so easily brow beaten into submission…
…it would have saved our marriages.
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Salvageable said:
Learning Hebrew is rather enjoyable, actually. But are you–sorry, you-all–going to have a Seder every Passover from now on? J.
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insanitybytes22 said:
LOL! Seder is kind of neat, actually. In the past I have loved the symbolism, the bitter herbs and the sweet.
Regardless, as a Messianic Jew, I now get to partake in feasting as a form of praise and worship! How cool is that? Baptists come close sometimes, but it is just not the same ๐
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Salvageable said:
I had a professor who pointed out that eating is mentioned in every chapter of the Gospel according to Luke. And Jesus compares heaven to a wedding reception. I think you-all are onto something here. J.
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Julie (aka Cookie) said:
“we” are now laughing so hard on our end that we’s think we’ve wet our pants!
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oneta hayes said:
Julie, are both of yous in the same pair of pants?
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Julie (aka Cookie) said:
Such is my luck ๐
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Mel Wild said:
Is that the royal “we” then? ๐ธ
Btw, you won’t be calling yourself a “Christian” anymore (it’s a pejorative term to Messianic Jews), which works nicely in some covert situations. ๐
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MJThompson said:
We too! We learned long ago the quickest way to acceptance is commonly refereed to as the path of least resistance. We confined our identity to the simplest of explanations. Our boss is a Jewish carpenter.
I used to work (as an associate pastor) with an older man (I was 26, he was 73) who had an irritating habit of always referring to himself in the third person plural. Never did he ever acknowledge any personal involvement, even when answering direct personal questions!
Asked, “are you a sinner?” He would respond,”we all have sinned and come short…”. “Do you think…?” was always followed by. “We may have perused such a notion, but we decided not”.
Unfortunately, we can only please some of the people some of the time; we can even please all of the people some of the time;
but we can never please our mother-in-law. Happy mother’s day!
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newenglandsun said:
Are you the Rothschild donor that got Macron elected so that the Jews can now run the EU as well?
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SLIMJIM said:
If you pick up Hebrew I might have go back and sharpen my Hebrew too
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ColorStorm said:
‘We is quite pleased’ eh?
‘hope my critics find this pleasing………….’ ๐
This is off the charts funny msb. Oh that some would be so jealous to even be on the radar of the critics. Then again, you will be chastised for wearing the wrong color of black coat, wrong shaped hat, and worshipping on Saturday.
Bonus: Aleph- Beit- the letters of the Hebrew alphabet. Genius. Beautiful script. Read right to left. Then there is the diction. Not so easy to learn. Then there is the diet thing. The king’s english is lookin real good. ๐
(Btw, your husband would have appreciated my all day efforts doing roofing work. (replacing rotted wood, unexpected stuff, etc, I’m wore out to the bone. We be looking good though. Need me some warm water and a vacation! lol
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insanitybytes22 said:
Quite impressed with your roofing efforts. Well done! I chuckled about “unexpected stuff,” hubby used those very words on bids and we argued for years to find a better phrase. Alas, “unexpected stuff,” it was. ๐
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MJThompson said:
We prefer ‘surprises’, inferring astonishing discoveries! Like a deep dip on a roller-coaster – while anticipation is exhilarating, actual reality can be upsetting. “Surprises’ at START favorably. LOL.
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ColorStorm said:
Yep. Kinda hard to bid with intelligence when you do not know what evil lurks beneath…………. ๐
Good man you got there.
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CC said:
LOLOL!!!!!!
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Mrs. N said:
Shabbat shalom! I found your blog in ” search ” while trying to break out of my boring blog reading routine and look for something ” new”. Wow- I guess I was successful- lol. You have inspired me to ” go forth” and blog from my heart. Just because I live in rural Japan doesn’t mean I have to be boring-eh? I started following you. I really enjoyed reading this humorous post. But I also ” get it”.
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