Fighting back is hard, especially if you are a sweet, gentle spirit as I am. (Don’t laugh outright, rolling on the floor in hysterics as my husband just did. He apparently does not believe that.) But I am quite serious here, I am actually a peaceful soul who prefers to just get along with everybody or avoid them entirely.
I have all those Christian values about forgiveness and mercy, about turning the other cheek, and also some ingrained damage from childhood. Even in middle school when those mean girls are trying to create their little cliques, I could not be bothered to care. “Where’s my carrot,” has been a frequent lamentation of my soul. As in, why would I even want to comply with your nonsense? Where is the payoff, where’s my carrot?
We can blame my mother here, she was and still is so good at completely withholding all approval, so I grew up not even knowing what approval was, or that carrots even existed. Complete learned helplessness. When I think about that, I am absolutely amazed, bedazzled by how miraculous it is that God found me, claimed me, redeemed me. My younger self didn’t even require God’s approval, didn’t even know His favor was possible. All in good humor here, but His carrots were not all that enticing either, as in, “I offer you abraded pride. Let me shatter you into a million pieces. There are pearls in the bottom of this cesspool.” How do you even speak to someone like me? I don’t know, but He did it.
Over the years I’ve also come to understand that what I once cloaked in Christian values, in turning the other cheek, was actually undesirable, sinful. I did not understand that we are actually at war here, “For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.”
Called to battle.
When we are called to battle, it is actually immoral to set your sword down and walk away, to refuse to fight for things that are important. We ourselves are important, as in God has made a tremendous investment in us, and we belong to Him. To not fight for ourselves is to not protect and defend His property.
The truth is another thing we are called to fight for. Jesus himself says, “I am the way, the truth, and the life…” If we cannot stand in the truth we are not fighting for our Lord and Savior. He is gentle and kind, but He is also a General, a King seated on a white horse, leading us to battle. Often we miss seeing this side of Christ, the power and authority He has.
God spoke to me gently about this for a long time, and then one day it was as if the gates of hell poured down my driveway and I was boxed in on all sides, could not walk away, could not run, and so I had to fight, and I learned that we will fight for the things we love, and if we aren’t willing to fight for them, then we don’t really love them at all.
That is a harsh truth and it doesn’t sit well with many people, because we often want to create a more peaceful world, to avoid conflict, and to not do things that are going to cost us. Jesus flat our tells us in Matthew 10:34, “Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.”
If you are one of those brash and bold warriors, without mercy, forever whacking people upside the head with a sword, you might need to tone it down a bit, but if you are like me, a sweet gentle spirit, don’t overlook the fact that love that does not fight back isn’t love at all. It’s actually indifference.
See, there's this thing called biology... 
We also need to choose our fights. When someone is challenging the Lord’s truth (especially from within the Church), we who know the truth are called to respond. When Christians debate the color of the new carpet or the menu for the next church dinner, the swords should remain in their sheathes. J.
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Ha! Ironically before I learned how to fight properly, we could have gone to war over carpet colors and dinner, but if someone had told me, “there are many paths to God,” I would have just walked away quietly. That’s the problem with not understanding what’s important, we’ll fight to the death over dinner because that’s the kind of thing that is important to us personally. What’s important to God we then ignore completely.
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Tone it down? Ha. That’s what the lukewarm say in the guise of unity. Unity at any expense is false confederacy, and a clear and present danger. True, the battle is not ours per se, but good gravy, we are reminded that indeed we are soldiers, and though we war not according to flesh and blood, there is a battle in which the Lord seeks sanctified pawns.
Avoid conflict you say? Yeah, how’s that workin out for ya………… lol
Truth is itself a conflict, and if it is valuable to us, it is surely worth the engagement. But yes, a good reminder too msb; the warrior……….the warfare……..the welfare………but with mercy. amen to that. Now if I can only commit that to Him who is worthy…….
Fare ye well!
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Amen, Colorstorm! Don’t be lukewarm. At the very least be a hot mess! Much preferable 🙂
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Ever heard the old Indian tale:
Me name big Chieffa a Running Water…….Gotta a two son……a hot anna cold…. gotta nother son a luke a………he not too hot…….
So yep, hot or cold…… your hot mess is preferable no doubt. lol
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I think God spoke to you and a million other women about kicking Trump’s butt.
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LOL! Well, with God anything is possible!
Just the same, there are many of us who are actually walking this fine line between actually having his behind…and being prepared to kick it at a moment’s notice.
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Now…wasn’t this interesting? Extend grace…and fight. That’s a complex dichotomy isn’t it?
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It really is a complex dichotomy, isn’t it? I guess like a lot of things in life there is a balance to be found.
One thing I really appreciate about some men, they can just stand in the truth, rather gently, but unyielding. So when I am surrounded on all sides by those telling me “God isn’t real” or “there are many paths to the Father,” I can just rest my eyes on them and know that I am not alone. Makes all the difference in the world.
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A three fold cord is not easily broken my friend
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Amen, Wally. Thank God for 3 fold cords.
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finding my way through the middle is hard—remember the movie, the 1973 original, Walking Tall—the sheriff with the big stick…the notion of a calculated sense of justice…I’d like a big stick right about now…as in I’ve got a big stick and I know how to us it by gosh!
and then there is the idiom “speak softly but carry a big stick” which harkens back to a favorite president, Teddy Roosevelt—with that wonderful “bully bully” of his—taking no crap—bold, yet soft like a teddy bear….
Over the years I’ve been know to have a good bit of what we might call righteous indignation…as I’ve aged, I have learned that I must find the middle—using brains over reactionary brawn has not come easy or naturally…I’ve always been more knee jerk—hit first and ask questions later—but now, maybe I’m learning to bide my time, bite my tongue, gauge the situation, then merely hit harder 😉
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Ha! Beautiful,and well said, Julie. “Bide your time,bite your tongue, and hit back harder,” I like it. That’s some good strategy. 🙂
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But not easy to remember 😘
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Nicely said. And again, I identify deeply with your experience.
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Amen. 🙂
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So beautiful… such a good truth that we need to be warriors, but balanced in a sense too, not whacking people, but not sitting off in a corner either.
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Christ admonished that if you are not for Him, by default you are automatically against Him. This must be accepted in ABSOLUTE terms. One way or the other – no intermediate position or place of neutrality!
In ministering to new converts (babes in Christ) this point must be made clear. Christ has remedied our separation from God, but the world continues to want to separate us from Christ. The temptation to compromise is cloaked in a clever guise of being ‘open-minded’, accusing us of ‘bias’, and ‘unfair’ judgment – causing many to ‘straddle the fence’ between two opposing world views. As is usually the case in such posturing, it tends to leave splinters in the most unwanted places.
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“Christ admonished that if you are not for Him, by default you are automatically against Him”
Amen, mjthompson. Speaking from experience here, He really wasn’t joking about that part. He means it.
No sticking your toe in the water and calling it good, He demands a full plunge. 🙂
He gave His all, He expects us to give our all, too. To love Him “with all your heart, all your soul, all your strength, and all your mind.”
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Same idea:
NIV Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.
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Good post. It seems to me that many Christians aren’t really fighters. I suppose that God has it that way to show how He advances His Kingdom through “weak” vessels so to speak.
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“When we are called to battle, it is actually immoral to set your sword down and walk away, to refuse to fight for things that are important. We ourselves are important, as in God has made a tremendous investment in us, and we belong to Him. To not fight for ourselves is to not protect and defend His property.”
“…don’t overlook the fact that love that does not fight back isn’t love at all. It’s actually indifference.”
I feel like this is a message God wants me to hear right now. I read somewhere else yesterday about this perspective and it also referred to it as indifference. I never thought about it this way. But it makes complete sense and it’s really making me think very hard about my current circumstances and what I might need to do instead of sit back and not respond or take a less “truthful” approach. Bring darkness into the light. Fight for truth. Thank you for sharing this.
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Thank you for reading and commenting. Much appreciated 🙂
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I am gentle spirit and my husband laughed like a hyena, too. But, then, he relented and said I am a fierce and passionate gentle spirit. 😀
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LOL! 😉
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