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pavedroadsI did not watch President Obama’s State of the Union Address nor the rebuttals, mostly because I already live in the land of fairy tales and romance, roaming around in alternate plains of reality and believing in impossible things like unicorns that poo skittles and dance down rainbows.

I’m already keenly aware of the fact that everything is awesome, that the economy is booming and that we have created more jobs than any other Westernized country in all the history of the world. I look out my window and I see people availing themselves of all this new and exciting opportunity, like how to have a proper stay-cation, rather than being bothered by all those old and burdensome things we use to pursue, like packing and travel and actually having to leave your house.

1911803_10152169668932954_1225329403_nI love the new found excitement of finding gas for less than two bucks a gallon and the camaraderie that springs forth from the fellowship of sharing gas reward tips and bargain hunting ideas with complete strangers.

And oh the joyous empowerment of free Obamacare, the incredible awesomeness of that blessing…..the deductibles that are higher than your income, the insurance that doesn’t cover anything, the six week waits for a doctor where you learn the value of triage and the wisdom of old folklore cures.

We have truly gone to the mountain top of soaring rhetoric and blank slates, exceeded our wildest dreams of lowered sea levels, and we now sit perched on the edge of a cliff, peering down with delightful excitement, surveying all our accomplishments.

What a wonderful world of free and prosperous everything, lacking only, well the free and the prosperous, who’s mere existence we have spitefully rendered invisible least they shatter our illusions and make us feel bad about ourselves.

govI know in my heart of hearts that our increased rates of suicide, the number of people who have dropped out of the work force, the foreclosures, the impending national debt, the social divisions, the ever present threat of terrorism and war, are just meaningless bits of background noise, washed completely away by gay marriage and free birth control.

Oh help me to believe in your dream Mr, President. Send the ObamaFairy my way, douse my eyes in glitter, wash me in your blue kool aid. I want so badly to believe.